Family Circus Navigator Gifts

"Kids, could you do Mommy a huge favor and go really far away from me? Thanks."

A Preschool of Fish

'How do you know I won't shrink if I didn't come with a washing instructions tag?'

'This is Tyler; he's mommy's precious little feral-angel.'

'sugar and spice my eye.'

'It may not be your feng shui, but it's my feng shui.'

"'Parent' should always be an action verb."

Desperate Househusbands: 'Help! My wife left me with the kids for two minutes while she ran to the store. Help!'

'We are considering a nursery expansion.'

"My seven-year-old is a prince, but my forty-seven-year-old is a pain in the ass."

Parental Training Course

Babies

The relay race

"Sergio, I think you've done a great job raising the children."

You can't focus on the cost of raising a child. True. They do have benefits. Mom! The glue spilled into your underwear drawer! Dad! Where's the toilet plunger? Though nothing specific leaps to mind.

'I feel much safer living in a gated community.'

"You mentioned separation anxiety. Don't worry, she'll be all right."

Coping during the 6 weeks school holidays.

Reason #149 for making sure the whole family wears seat belts: It helps keep the kids quiet.

"This baby will hold more than a hundred and twenty-five cubic feet of family rancor."

Mother's Day: 2nd Sunday in May, Others Day: Every day before and after the 2nd Sunday in May.

"Will you turn that TV down? Can't you see I'm on the phone?"

"No, we're not there yet because your father refuses to ask for directions!"

'No offence. The other breast and I seemed to click.'

'Would you like me to have a word with educational psychologist about Julie?'

The Queen of Static Electricity: 'Boring Rainy Day Sitting Area.'

Cr�che Seige

Pre-School Child Center - Computer LiterateNon-Computer Literate.

Police Log

"Hah, good luck to them when they try to flush THAT!"

"I've been a mess since Jake left for college, so now we have a boy who comes in a couple of times a week to leave wet towels all over and challenge everything I say."

"Working" from home

Tantrum Scene Do Not Cross

'Looks to be a very young universe.'

'I've had it for the last seventeen years.'