Fame Critic Pillows

Fired Big Shots Who's Who.

"Now, how can I be of assistance?"

Anna Calvi

Kritik's Korner

Jack Gleeson

The americanisation of vulture.

"Bleeeee! It's plastic."

"The moral of the story, honey, is that being a celebrity does not make you a credible children’s book author."

A cross section of the brain shows what a man thinks about.

Armageddon

If humans instead of dinosaurs had lived when the big asteroid hit.

"Amateurs."

A knight sent to kill a dragon armed with a fly swatter

"Sir, a bunch of bald-headed, castrated humanoids wearing Nikes just materialised with their luggage back there."

'No. . . I'll never spend £400 on a haircut. . .'

David Grohl - Foo Fighters

'For the actress who benefitted most by rehab...'

'Democracy? -- do you REALLY want the bars closed every election day?'

"Welcome to Sugar Free Farm! The reality show, where celebs go cold turkey on their sugar addictions for two weeks."

"Get off the stage and get a copy of 'Studies of Laughter in Interaction'—I think you'll enjoy it."

Ranked Voting in N.Y.C.

'The good news is your life sentence is about over.'

Non Thought For The Day.

"The script isn't funny, but maybe if we put some unfunny actors in it and get an unfunny director it will be funny."

"It's tough to get him moving, but once he's going he never stops."

"Fancy dyeing your hair white so everyone could see it was you who played a shocker!"

"I don't like lawyer jokes. Lawyers don't think they're funny and other people don't think they're jokes."

'I know I don't look like a matinee idol of yesteryear anymore, but neither do they!'

Nick Cave

A skip full of fools.

Snow White and her Seven people.

Hedgehog holding sign saying 'the end is nigh' as man invents the wheel.

'There's nothing wrong with him-just delusions of glandular.'

This action stuff is okay, but try a romance or comedy next time.

Aladdin and the magic telemarketer lamp. Your first 3 wishes are free!* *By accepting wishes, user agrees to lifetime monthly charges, activation fees, and all applicable taxes.