Faithful Power-seeker Pillows

'God has heard your political prayers but he says that the other place is full at the moment...'

Revival Meeting - Simultaneous translation of all talking in tongues.

"Listen Herb, once you become the boss and decide who gets a raise, then you can have a raise."

'I'm 60-40 in favor of the 60.'

"Life is very fragile so we should handle it with 'prayer'."

'Bring me some more power.'

Classic Autos: We have muscle cars for weaklings!

''No other gods before me'? Oh - You're one of THOSE types.'

'Even More Disciples'

'I'm just going to say my prayers. Any requests?'

'I'm looking for a job that satisfies my lust for power.'

Jesus breaks the bread.

"No, no - I'm just looking for a balance of power that corrupts in moderation."

Glass Ceiling

'Get an afterlife!'

'What do you call money that slides off the collection plate?'

Minister Starts at a New Church

"Lately, I've become more spiritual, and less religious."

Robot about to eat a battery

"It's lonely here at the top. Thank goodness I've never been a people person."

"Sure, you could make a good living in private industry, but believe me, you wouldn't be running any kingdoms."

"And how long till they start saying the 'Great' after my name."

Monks play conkers with crucifix

"Please, God, help me get up, that's all I ask... I'll go right to church..."

Jeff Sessions

"It's summer and kids need an outlet...an electrical outlet!"

'One really nice thing up here is that it's always very easy to get an audience with a Pope.'

'Uh, is there a TEACHER'S edition?'

Man prays: 'Lord help me to be humble, and I want that by 10am Monday.'

'When I reach the top, Henderson, I won't forget all the little people I climbed over to get there.'

'Fathers Day.'

'Is it ethical to pray for an amicable divorce?'

Cross Umbrella

'I've got the inside track ... But the Devil uses the big freeway.'

'Yes, I do find motherhood fulfilling. However, I find being a sales Vice-President even more fulfilling.'