Faithful Philosophers Gifts

'If Jesus died to forgive our sins, the least we can do is commit a few.'

'It was quite a relief when St. Peter clicked 'access granted'.'

Has faith, but accepts evolution: ( GOD enclosed in walking fish).

'Just ask yourself -- Are you better off now than you were two thousand years ago?'

'Look, I never said salvation would be PRETTY!'

"You say I can move mountains? Right now,it's all I can do to turn over a new leaf!"

Caption Contest TK

"Any distinguishing 'PARSONAL' characteristics?"

"God works in mysterious ways."

That feeling when you know the preacher is talking directly to you.

'Don't believe everything you read in the papers!' (Vicar to lady reading the war cry).

Sunday 10 and 2: The Usual Superstitions.

"Yes, but you were the defender of the wrong faith."

'Okay - who leaked?'

"No, you cannot have another planet. You only played with the last one for a week."

'Is there something bothering you, besides sin, crime, hunger, that sort of thing?'

'I wonder if there's a message up there somewhere.'

"Do you believe the world is all an illusion?" "I know it is. I know it can be bent by our collective will. When I was born, there were horses and buggies in the streets. But as soon as we all believed we could do it, we went to the moon." "Oh, I agree. That's why I'm trying to get the whole internet to retweet 'It's possible to upload our minds into immortal robot bodies.' If the entire hive mind of Earth tweets that at the same time, it's got to come true." "I hope not. I'd hate for you to end

'Kill all the Canaanites? -- Won't that set a bad precedent?'

Jesus wept

"I don't see why divine intervention and government intervention have to be mutually exclusive."

"Nonsense - we're far less religious than you are."

'Have you got anything for omnipotence?'

Maybe I'd better write a thank you letter for the Last Supper after all

Priest

Out for lunch... GOD

Welcome to Hell - No Smoking

Sooner or later, 'These trying times' become 'The good ol' days'.'

Clerical Training Course - 'Gentlemen, we are here to practise what we preach.'

"So Jesus, what denomination are you?"

Atheist Convention: 'I don't believe it!'

'How do we know YOU'RE not bearing false witness?'

'His version of sin is different from the press account.'

"If we're doing such a good job of keeping the devil away, how come we have so many of these infernal machines around here?"

'Pray for peace... or war.'