Faithful Funny Friend Pillows

You're dead to me, Marsha. And that's just the way I like it."

"The bad news is that I backed into a fan. The good news is my owner's a plumber."

Priest

A Punch and Judy Professor is visited by Death as a puppet.

'It's good to see you, Mr. McWit, but you do realize that today is neither Christmas or Easter?'

'My god! Have you seen the size of this chiropodist's bill?!!'

"We missed you at church Sunday."

'Haven't seen you in church lately John?'

"Must we have ten minutes blasphemy every night?"

"My fellow mantises...I can barely believe this, but it has come to my attention that there is a lack of prayer in this church!"

Kid praying: 'If it's okay with you, don't record this one.'

"The difference between us and them is...they can be reproduced by unskilled labour."

"So join me in prayer for those who are damned if they do and damned if they don't..."

Priest's x-ray showing his crucifix.

"And now, a few words about the feel-God factor"

'Still no money, but a lot more IOU's than usual!'

'Great! You mean it's obedience school prom season already!'

'Well, looking on the bright side, there's only 10 of them.'

Two men in T-shirts, one shirt says Jesus loves me, the other Jesus loves me more.

IOUs In The Church Collection Plate

Interfaith dialogue

"Well, he loves people, the birds that fly, the fish that swim, and all the creatures of the forest."

"It was a little preachy."

"You know, Father, they say the Old Testament is the new New Testament."

Martin Luther's 96th Thesis

"If he doesn't like the hand puppet routine, I'll try running the burning bush idea by him."

'Look, Brother Timothy - a sign from God!'

'It's an innovative way to boost attendance.'

"What do you mean the message wasn't directed at me, the Pastor said my full name three times!"