Faithful Humor Lover Pillows

'I can't take off my clothes - I'm Missouri Synod Lutheran!'

'I've got no problem with December, but what do I blog about the rest of the year?'

We're willing to flee temptation, if we can leave a forwarding address.

The Last upper: Novus Ordo Style

"Call this an iceberg? When I was a kid we wouldn't have called this an iceburg!"

'Haven't seen you in church lately John?'

"Hey! These are still good!!"

"Pastor Bob is the leader of the flock, son, not the herd."

The Assumption of Mary

Priest's x-ray showing his crucifix.

IOUs In The Church Collection Plate

Martin Luther's 96th Thesis

Safe driver.

'Still no money, but a lot more IOU's than usual!'

'Well, looking on the bright side, there's only 10 of them.'

Beer Van and Ice Cream Van

"It was a little preachy."

"Hey! I was trained in 1948 and was good enough for then, so it's good enough for now....whipper-snapper!"

"If he doesn't like the hand puppet routine, I'll try running the burning bush idea by him."

"You know, Father, they say the Old Testament is the new New Testament."

"And now, a few words about the feel-God factor"

"Say AHHH...MEN."

"Let's start a small group."

"What do you mean the message wasn't directed at me, the Pastor said my full name three times!"

'Now, Mrs Althorpe, if you think you see the man who assaulted you, we just want you to touch him on the shoulder.' (Mrs Althorpe beats a man up and then says she doesn't recognise any of them)

'Is there any way we could ease into these GRADUALLY?'

'Let us now turn to the Gospel According to St. Matthew for today's sob story.'

"My Lord, you said you'd walk with me, but I only see one set of footprints."

Holy Relics.

Holy phone

"Faith cannot be bought. We do, however, offer an attractive leasing option."

"This weekend is seriously messing with some of my previously held beliefs."

Sisyphus, 117 million years on

Good Christians should be willing to die for President Trump."

'Buddha never said anything of the kind! -- You read that on a bumper sticker!'