Faithful Comic Reader Gifts

'Is it ethical to pray for an amicable divorce?'

"Uh-oh. Get ready for another tribulation. God's raging on social media again."

'Am I being too suspicious or do you think it's possible that they're crooked?'

"Yes. I said 2 by 2, but you needed to use 2 by 4s for the Ark...begin again."

'If you give up alcohol, cigarettes, sex, red meat, cakes and chocolate, and don't get too excited, you can enjoy life for a few more years yet.'

'Remember only you can prevent forest fires.'

"A retired superhero's re-purposed utility belt"

"Either that's Marmaduke with a lizard's head in front of us, or I really mixed up my meds."

Billy. The Kid.

"Relax. I just had a vitamin."

The Amazing Man-Spider

'Me, I don't spend my pocket money: I hoard it...'

Support group for sheep.

"Ernestine is trying to get St. Patrick to change his mind."

"Stop summoning me about rising sea levels. I do costumed supervillains staling jewels, men in beanies grabbing handbags - that sort of thing."

Tarzan of the Grapes.

Atomic Bear: Part 21

"Don't make me warn you again, monkey. Stay outa the curiosity racket."

Introducing...Anagraman.

'Excuse me could you please direct me to the nearest toilet?'

Caption contest. After last year's 3,000 entries, we're doing it again! Visit Speedbump.com for info and send your entries to speedbumpcomic@comcast.net.

"How was I supposed to know that the apple was a controlled substance?"

"No flight of the Bumblebee"

X-ray Psychology.

Mayhem, Inc. Part 23

Time Machine Collision

Atomic Bear: Part 22

'What sort of wines do you like?' ... 'Powerful ones!'

'Being a superhero doesn't mean that everything about me is super you know!'

Brian's canine Tread-o-Sod saved him the trouble of cleaning up after Mitzi.

The Salmon Run

"Yeah, I'm moonlighting. It's a living."

"Then one day, as I caught a tennis ball in midair, I asked myself, 'Is this all there is?'"

'Enough already. It's a car, not a transporter.'

'See? The idiots put my danged knee replacement in backward!'