Faithful Comic Lover Gifts

"That's just a bush that happens to be on fire - I'm over here."

"They're intercessors, Richard, not middlemen."

"We're in deep trouble... there are some people quoting back to us what we taught them."

'Am I being too suspicious or do you think it's possible that they're crooked?'

"Yes. I said 2 by 2, but you needed to use 2 by 4s for the Ark...begin again."

"Thor! I am Thor! Ha. Just kidding. I'm Tom the Seagull."

International Women's Day

"'I don't want war'. . . well, wither our translation program is broke or this president has a strange kind of humor!"

...and then I...wait....What's that?? Whoa! We're on a spaceship! This is fun! Hey! What's this button do? Can I pull this lever? Are we there yet? Take a selfie with us? Do we get snacks? Can I drive? Are we there yet? Something we said? Just imagine if we'd been obnoxious!

Billy. The Kid.

"Either that's Marmaduke with a lizard's head in front of us, or I really mixed up my meds."

I'm going to practice on you before I start managing other people.

Moses separating his Laundry.

Something Wilted This Way Comes.

"Now that's what I call customer service!"

No-Work Orange

"We're keeping you overnight because the nurses love you!"

"I'm not here to slay you. I'm here to talk to you about diversifying your investment portfolio."

'You just don't know when to give up, do you?'

"Have you been playing dice?"

'Hang on a minute: What does 'IVF' mean?!'

McMorkim's Cheeses Security A gang of mice wheeling in a giant mousetrap with Pizza and Beer as bait to a Security Guard's post hoping to gain access to a cheese Factory if the Guard is trapped.

Early photobombing

God putting the finishing touches to the Pug.

"The Hound of the Baskervilles, Watson--I took him walkies!"

Password Error: Snow White and the seven dwarfs not recognised as eight characters.

Window Treatment

"Stop summoning me about rising sea levels. I do costumed supervillains staling jewels, men in beanies grabbing handbags - that sort of thing."

The Food Chain

'I think your father's had one of his big ideas...'

"...so it appears we were talking to his butt that entire time."

"Sorry mum, but I just don't get the decimal system..."

"You can either make a pledge or join us in this weekend's Barkathon."

This condition could be hereditary - does stupidity run in your family?

"Are there treats? Just grab the treats and get outta there!"