Face Recognition Expert Gifts

"Don't tell me....I never forget a face mask."

I'm not good with names but never forget a face. Of course, that's not very useful right now.

All Harold's aptitude test showed is that he had an aptitude for taking tests.

'Who was the murderer? Well Watson, that's the killer question.'

"You said mindfulness could help us do well on the test, so I filled it up with as much as I could last night."

Pull the udder one

"How'd I do on the test?"

Congratulations Strike Over!

Foxhole - digging robot

'Before we get started, let's go around the table and practice making eye contact.'

Batman - Face ID

'I'm going to ask you one more time; who left a hot mug on this table?'

'The really scary part is that he is the new head of human resources.'

"Your first job is to learn to recognize your boss' voice on the phone."

'I'm looking for a workaholic who feels the great job he does is compensation enough.'

Optician: 'I can't seem to switch off.'

'Bonny, I've forgotten...What time is that 9 o'clock meeting tomorrow?...'

"Is it ne'er do wells, or ne'ers do well?"

My husband is a world expert, but unfortunately it's only on maganese bronze.

"I'd like to be the first to welcome you to our company. But, I've decided not to hire you."

'If you think current GPS systems are annoying when they're Recalculating, you'll really hate the next big thing coming.'

Robot Olympics

Let the profit-making begin!

"When I said 'do everything for me,' I didn't mean drink my beer and eat my pizza."

'What's he going to be when he passes all his exams?' 'A pensioner!'

"Since you're a lawyer, it will be a bar exam."

A Vet? I had you picked in advertising.

'We'll parachute in and surprise them with their sales award.'

"This test wasn't fair! No way it's an accurate measure of what I know!"

Parking validation

'For the remainder of this health and safety discussion, I shall refrain from leaning back too far on my chair.'

'Before we give him your job, could you show him around the plant?'

Forged signed memorabilia.

"I remember when I used to be 'cutting edge'!"

"Meetings are where I've learned to communicate with my coworkers via facial expressions only."