Explorer Of Ancient Worlds Gifts

"I crawl that I may savor the richness and diversity of people and places along the way."

"You're losing the audience. Switch to the Powerpoint presentation."

'Well, there's something you don't see every day'

Ancient Racing

Physician tending a mummy.

'Don't ask me why but he feels a great deal of pride in calling it his 'man-cave'.'

'It's an extinction notice.'

'The dreaded Anachronisaurus strikes again!'

Tourists in Egypt

"I couldn't care less if being Homo Sapiens is the latest trend. While you're living in our cave, you better act like a true Neanderthal."

Zeus's Caddy

'I have a feeling we are not in Kansas anymore.'

Atlas with the earth, says: 'So then I thought, Why not just roll the damn thing?'

The Gladiator.

"Life after death"

'When do they learn to stand upright?'

"Oooh. . . I've got sand under my wrappings and it's so itchy. . !!"

"I'm having my entrails read."

Pyramid Handicap Parking

Souvenirs.

"Wow! That's some PowerPoint presentation."

"Sadie, I just heard they discovered lots of ancient cities buried hundreds of years ago in the jungles of Cambodia. They've each got weird geometric patterns outlining what may have been gardens. But no one really knows what they were used for. I guess what I'm asking you is... what were they used for? Y'know, since you were there to see them in their prime. They were used for ritual sacrifices of dullards. For educational purposes, I shall now perform one."

Mummy Beggar

"I spy with my little eye..." "The ocean! It's always the ocean!"

Pompeii restoration project.

Geography class - UR Here.

'Forget it lads. We've been refused planning permission for this one!'

'Let me get this straight: you'll answer three questions, but only three questions? No kidding? Boy, is this my lucky day or what?'

"This is amazing! Roughly translated, it says 'King Tut was here o.k.'"

"What was the Roman attitude to construction?"

'I'm inventing the wheel, and I'd like you to be my SPOKESMAN.'

Cavemen. Wheel being burnt with fire.

"Sorry, this is in Hebrew, and I only read Hieroglyphics!"

Dept of Egyptology - Toot and Come In.

Egypt 1896. Dr Howard Prendergast and Percy Smythe discover the tomb of King Ahktuman the Practical Joker, proving conclusively that the ancient Egyptians were the first culture to use whoopee cushion.