Expense Entertainers Gifts

"I did warn you about the after effects."

'No, your guess isn't as good as mine.'

'Now THAT'S a presentation! Great delivery, great graphics, and he moonwalks from the room.'

"Remember, money is only a tool - to make more money."

"The new revenue stream is finally kicking in."

'I know my resume makes me seem overtrained, but I really wasn't paying attention.'

Orchestra Class Air Guitar.

"Well, if you hadn't misfiled it in the first place it wouldn't have been lost."

'Actually, they're a hybrid. They are a blue-chip, common stock.'

"I'm putting you on country music."

'Take a letter,'

Landing That Tough Account

Budget reaction.

Roller Coasters

'See if you can get them to flambe the check, too.'

'I thought up the term 'too big to fail'. So where's my bonus?'

"I'm not sure if that bill is correct or not, sir. We just throw a bunch of charges on there to see which ones stick."

"It's a profit and loss statement. Read it with gusto!"

"We've decided to cut back and have Christmas every other year."

Long Speech Alarm at Company Dinner

'The next phase in which we carve the stones ornately will cost a little more than the previous ones.'

'Here's something you need to hear...'

'Frankly, we keep you around for entertainment value.'

'What wine goes with an enormous expense account?'

"Sorry about the disguise.But we've had to reduce our budget for the 'witness protection programme'."

Man with Yoyo, "He was never over-lavish at entertaining clients."

"But Kevin, why can't we have a proper jacuzzi like next door?"

'The boys in accounting used to give me a hard time about ordering a $1,000 bottle of wine - until I invited them along.'

Harper's Cat Speaks: 'To whom it may concern: I will be cutting down on kitty treats.'

Warning Wisecracks or good-natured barbs alcohol maybe hazardous to your health,

'The x-rays are conclusive. We found some extra money hidden in the secret compartment of your wallet.'

'This Investment Portfolio is an extravagant waste of money! Oh hold on... that's my expense account!'

'I'm afraid the Christmas party has been cancelled on cost grounds...but the good news is that the boss has said you can still come in and photocopy your bottoms!'

'Tell them that, by funding our project, they agree the universe must be expanding, and that, as it expands, so must our budget!'