Expat Nostalgia Gifts

Big Name Foreign Rugby Players Are Going Home.

'We like to spend 51 weeks of the year at our Florida holiday home...'

Emigrating to France.

'Here's a picture of my mom before Photoshop!'

"Our immigration lawyer is now living in Guatemala."

On today's Ask Sadie Radio Hour, we discuss one topic: the constant flirtation with fleeing to Canada. Canada has universal health insurance, far fewer killings, much less bigotry, more social mobility, better schools, less obesity, 50 weeks maternity leave, blah blah blah. But that means nothing, because you know what they don't have? Panicky media telling you who to blame for the sky falling! We'll be back, after this message from Depends Undergarments.

I wanted to holiday at home...But in Spain.

Pension planning for Brexit

'They gave me a choice...they would either off-shore my job, or I could keep my job if I moved to India.'

Half French/half English.

'You can't find a job?... Have you tried Asia?'

The 1960s, 50 Years Later

"I play 'backside'. My 'backside' is always sitting on the bench."

'I see that you're a fully integrated immigrant to this country.'

"Can I call you back? I'm creating happy memories of my childhood for my father."

Just when he thought things couldn't get worse...

"What's full English breakfast in Spanish?"

"The sixties are over, Ralph. The seventies and the eighties, for God's sake, are over. Give it a rest!"

New York, London, Paris, Munich, Everybody Talk About Pop Music

Gin Lane.

"When we implant your pacemaker, we can, for a modest additional fee, also implant your beeper."

You're like the grandpa I never had, Mort. You never knew your grandpappy, Randy? Oh, no, I knew him. Grandpa Randy was an intrepid archaeologist who broke hearts and defeated villains all over the world. "Indiana Randy's" life story became the stuff of legend. They even made some movies based on his exploits. I'm just saying you're nothing like him. I was going to see those films back in the '80s, but the matinees were past my bedtime.

Eighties Throwback.

'Of all the lemonade joints in all the world....'

Somewhere In France... The Louvre turns out to be just another metro station.

"I tell you what. If this country votes to remain in the E.U. I'll pack up and move to Spain... if I'm still allowed to."

In the Year 2525

PERSONNEL, 'Our retirement plan is that we try to get you Swedish citizenship.'

"Well, here it is, but I don't see any pot."

Court House. A guy I wanted to call to testify about my client's character moved overseas. An expat witness!

Rip Van Yuppie

The Great Fashion Panic of 1979.

Retail Store

"I have a flat and need a lift."

Weasel being fined for trading in imperial measures.