Exercise Debunker Gifts

'I think cowboys are just plain lazy: Why else would you have to carry them all the time?'

Recipes from The Lying Gourmet

"I've had a lot of exercise today! I jumped to several conclusions, ran my mouth on the phone, and I just cycled through 500 cable channels!"

"My blood type...it's the type that doesn't like to exercise."

And this model comes with a fitness tracker.

" ... and if we finish pillaging early enough, we can still catch the evening Zumba class on the after deck."

'Gathering dust isn't dangerous in itself, but it's a sign of lack of exercise.'

'The only exercise I believe in is the exercise of power.'

"Professor Williams had at first been reluctant to join the Assistant Deans in their Think Great Thoughts aerobics. He later came to enjoy the activity."

"Fit watch say me need more steps."

'Why are jogging on the spot?'

"Remember me? I'm your running shoes. Remember what running is?"

Jeff was watching his weight.

'Can I have a refund if she puts the weight back on.'

"I didn't miss my workout...I didn't miss it one bit!"

5. Install all equipment carefully. 6. Never increase the weight load of any exercise machine when you are by yourself.

"So all these years you never did yoga but just walked around carrying the mat?"

"He said, 'Won't you guide my sleigh tonight?' I thought that meant steer."

'Flipping the remote and clicking the mouse are his low-impact aerobics.'

Exercise Car.

"We daren't go in there at our age. We'd probably end up with slipped discos!"

"MMPHH. . . I said I don't think I'm built for yoga!"

'He's started jogging to work.'

Maude's yoga classes were beginning to pay off.

''Buy low, sell high' is not considered an aerobic activity.'

'I felt an overwhelming nostalgia for the old video games where you sit on your arse.'

"I think that form '10,000' steps may have been 9,999 too many!"

"Your compulsive talk about crazy diets, get rich schemes, and mail order drugs -- your pacemaker's been hacked and you're spamming."

Weight Loss Clinic: 100% guaranteed.

Airport Security. I had to go through the security pat-down three times --- They had trouble believing this is just my body and I'm not hiding anything.

'Well at least we got him off the sofa.'

"Exercise?...What you need is more napping!"

'if your wife ever asks you to meet her at Pilates...don't! It's not a pizzeria.'

An overweight lazy man chooses to exercise on a motorbike at a gym.

"My New Year's resolution is to get fit and watch more TV."