Exercise Avoiders Gifts

'Oh stop complaining, if it wasn't for the mosquitoes you wouldn't get any exercise at all!'

'The Surgeon-General today advised everybody to turn the TV off and go take a walk.'

"I hate gym...but I started liking it more when I think of it as a health club paid for by the government."

"What exercises do you do?"

"It's true: no more burpees."

"O.K. you're ready to go on to the less embarrassing weights."

"I swapped my 'couch to 5k' training app for a '5k to couch' one!"

"It's a smart hamper that sucks up clothes. My mom claims I leave my clothes on the floor, so she has it follow me wherever I go."

"When was the last time you exercised something other than a purchase option?"

'Honestly, dear, I'm just giving my pedometer a rest.'

"You need to lose 20 cable channels."

"The gods seem angrier than usual today."

'The doctor said you need more exercise, so I've hidden the remote control.'

"Shhh! I'm hiding from Mistress who wants to go on a walk! It's cold and raining outside: no way I'm wearing that stupid coat again!"

'Hey, we have one of those. You hang your laundry on it.'

'I tried running once, but I kept spilling my drink.'

"We need to walk."

"Our new treadmill is easy to use, you just set it to the speed setting that's most comfortable for you."

'If God had wanted me to touch my toes, he would have put them closer to my hands!'

'Gathering dust isn't dangerous in itself, but it's a sign of lack of exercise.'

'If you want to get some exercise, carry this out to the garbage.'

"Will I still be able to not exercise?"

'The only exercise I believe in is the exercise of power.'

"I'm exhausted! I've just binge-watched the entire series of 'Fresh Air and Exercise.'"

"I considered riding my bike to work until I realized it involved pedaling and sweat."

Give me a child at seven and I will show you the MAN!

"Why run a marathon when you can sleep through it?"

'Why are jogging on the spot?'

The Candy Shop. Anytime I eat candy it immediately goes to my mid-section. No time to waist!

'Look! A rock hard body in 90 days!'

'You need more excercize. But I'm drinking as fast as I can.'

"My brain said, exercise....my tummy auto-corrected that to, extra-fries!"

"Fit watch say me need more steps."

'Your back went out because your front went out.'

'But, dear, I am walking the dog.'