Executive Assistants Gifts

When he was between Executive Assistants, filing became a challenge for Jonathan.

'You have appointments lined up right until you leave for vacation in 2008.'

'Prepare for some commotion, for the VPs lunch meeting I ordered Shish Kabobs.'

'Ms. Dixon, hire someone to clean my office.'

'Bixby, it's time to visit the Wonderful World of Word Processing!'

Bob's importance was all out of whack to his job title.

"Ms. Sweeney, take a letter, a memo, an email, a tweet, a text, never mind...I forgot what I was going to say."

"You're invited to our management excursion. Come dresses as a pinata."

I've always wanted to quit while I was ahead but the opportunity never presented itself.

'Why is it that nothing ever gets done at these meetings?'

'Do you think, perhaps, that we could start shooting for a few longer-term goals around here?'

"Is this to make me feel bad for not getting you that laptop?"

"So what kind of mood is he in?"

"The good news is you’re the only one we’re not firing ... the bad news is you’re the only one to run the department."

Where your mind & battle are los

'You forget, I'm a blackbelt in powerpoint.'

'And were there a point to your proposal, Henderson - What would it be?'

'Surely you wouldn't want me to laugh at your joke if I didn't think it was funny!'

'Noticeboard? I forgot it was there to be honest.'

Whats ticking away in YOUR filing system?

'Williams, we're not used to receiving such excellent ideas as these, so we'd like to tone them down a bit.'

Golly, �1m a year isn't too much. I don't know why your shareholders don't understand you.

"You've got to fill in these forms to join the 'How to reduce bureaucracy' seminar."

"Stock options for your thoughts."

On his desk, a cat has an in box, out box and litter box.

Businesswoman Empowerment

"This is a merit-based organization! Can't you see I’ve hired the very best and most qualified yes-men money can buy?"

"This position has become very important to the company."

"Yes Sir, I'm still working on the 'ins and outs' of their proposal."

"On a more positive note the guidance we’ve published on the services we can’t provide is published in 37 different languages."

Occu-Pie Mars

At the end of each day, Gary had approximately 7 minutes of free time – which left him feeling very vulnerable.

"My email is down... talk to me."

'It's only a hunch, but I think everybody bought everything they needed, last time.'

"Can I savor this for a few moments? The ball's never been in my court before!"