Senior Executive Assistant Gifts

'The job title is 'Senior Executive Assistant,' but basically I'm looking for a toady.'

'What bothers me about these meetings is even though it's work, I have the nagging feeling I ought to leave and get back to work.'

"Looks like we found the issue."

"You've got your corner office, so what more do you want?"

'I hope you're not threatened by powerful women, because you're fired.'

'If I had to use one word to describe our strategy.'

"Remember the golden rule: more buzzwords, less real words."

"Bert, I'm confused. What happens after we circle the wagons, tighten our belts and walk a mile in our customer's shoes? Is that when the chickens come home to roost?"

"I'm going to bombard you with graphs until you agree with me."

'You forget, I'm a blackbelt in powerpoint.'

'And were there a point to your proposal, Henderson - What would it be?'

'Noticeboard? I forgot it was there to be honest.'

"Forget five-year plans. Let's just figure out how to make it to lunch."

Whats ticking away in YOUR filing system?

Phrenology bust with sections for different currencies.

"And need I remind you, the 'art of the deal' is the lifeblood of this company."

'Now that I have your attention...'

"Yes Sir, I'm still working on the 'ins and outs' of their proposal."

"Tariffs love me...tariffs love me not..."

Occu-Pie Mars

'We invest so much money in training staff...it's a mystery to me why businesses would risk losing them.'

"Can I savor this for a few moments? The ball's never been in my court before!"

"Marshall, somewhere out there, just waiting for us, is a loophole in the system."

"I was hoping this presentation would be more interesting upside down."

The Businessmen Have to Make Decisions from Many Options

"These projections don't make sparkles shoot out my ass."

'We've set the bar quite high at this company. It helps us control bonuses.'

"I’ve combined all your outstanding debt into what we here in the banking business like to call a honkin’ big loan."

"Here's what I'm gonna do."

"Well, ordinary men have colleagues. Successful men have victims."

"I'm afraid 'It's a surprise', doesn't cut it as a growth strategy."

'This time we're going to do things right. And if that doesn't work, we'll just go back to stealing.'

'You could be a constant inspiration for us to come up with a plan to get a leg up on our competition...you're hired!'

'That's our mission statement.'