Execution-themed Humor Appreciators Gifts

BRINGGGG!, 'I TOLD you to turn off your cell phone!'

"We need to make some cuts. We'll start with integrity, accountability, openness, and transparency."

Playing Fetch.

baby sweetcorn...

"Dear Wendy, please excuse the tardiness of my response to your recent tweet from Hoboken."

'Stuck on a desert island, in the middle of the ocean, with only a palm tree for company, it's a bloody joke.'

"They're so like us."

End the Winter Blues

'WD-40 un-sticks things that should move and duct tape makes things that shouldn't move, stop.'

"Now you've seen the bust how about letting me see Naples?"

Man runs into Bigfoot taking a selfie.

"It's good to know she was butchered for a noble cause."

"He was a sea rescue."

A Quiet Rebuke.

Kids ask repetitively: 'Is the recession over yet?'

Divine Desk Bins

'This chair ain't big enough for the both of us.'

Comb Sweet Comb

"Can't we have 'PRESS BUTTON' to shut up the commentator's gobbledegook."

"My guess it's guacamole."

Sheep In Curlers

Couple using thier new garden hose in the rain

Feline Evolution.

"It's nowhere near as far away as we thought!"

A military officer sits at his desk with desk trays marked 'Search' and 'Destroy.'

'Oooh, Jimmy, the teacher put another throwing star on your paper! Great!'

"I'm so glad we don't need a selfie stick."

Telekinetics on strike...

'Double Dannys': Danny Baker and Danny Kelly.

"Why T-Rexes do not play volleyball..."

"Your profile didn't mention you being a chewer."

My client is claiming that you have discriminated against him as a species, that your refusal to let him sniff client's bottoms is against his canine rights and that your policies have acted against him reaching partnership.

David and Goliath.

'I have one last question: this beach is clothing optional, right?'

'Yipee! A cockroach!'