Exclusivity Police T-Shirts

Shorn sheep gets Baaaaard!

La Table

'I'm sure M'lady will appreciate the mashed potatoes. Our chef uses only grass-fed single-udder butter.'

Please buzz off. That's my flower!

"Sir, you're not on the list - we've checked it twice."

"Bartleson, are we cronies yet?"

"...We don't trust any restaurant that has room for us."

"Do you have anywhere our friends won't have discovered?"

Members only.

This club is for members only

My latest invention is genius. It's an affinity card for our best customers. That's not a new idea. Airlines, rental car agencies, hotels … They all have loyalty programs where you can earn discounts and special treatment. Spare me. Ours has a way better name: The Cafe Exclusive VIP Premier Executive Best Customer Reward Program. And we don't trouble customers with confusing discounts and benefits. All hail the VIP premier cheapskate.

I shall now unveil my first great experiment in exploitative capitalism. Oh joy. Institute for Capitalist Exploitation. Beneath this sheet is an extraordinary creation. I give you … The new cafe exclusive VIP premier executive best customer reward card. Available to anyone who pays $9.95 a month for membership. Fine print: Includes no benefits.

"You. You. And you."

Please wait to be vetted

"That's the beauty part, when you buy an island the sharks come with it."

Posh store has sign: When Flaunting Is Not Enough.

Reserved

"Do you have a reservation?"

"It costs how much to join?"

Smokers not putting their cigarette butts in the bin person so frustrated he puts the smoker in the bin

"This is a private club. Are you a Mamba ?"

'Hey! This club is for members only!'

'Order 50,000 gift bags. We're gonna do Beverly Hills!'

Club Heaven.

"Mr. Lee's Chinese Palace, one of the city's best-kept secrets."

"Welcome to the club. Not my club, mind you - you couldn't afford that."

Garrick club. Men's men only.

"Now you tell me I'm the only member?"

"I'm afraid you have the common cold lady for choir. We don't have anything more exclusive."

"I often mistake a twenty pound note for a membership card."

"Tia Carmen, can I join your Wise Latina League?"

Social Exclusive Unit.

"Hole In The Wall" (members only.) ? ?

"Your request to join is being reviewed by the group moderator!"

"So long, Bill. This is my club. You can't come in."