Everyday Humor Lover Gifts

How it started: How it's going

'Am I being too suspicious or do you think it's possible that they're crooked?'

"Look! No hands!"

Crap from the future.

"I've never heard of it, either, but nothing ventured, nothing gained, I always say!"

'Of course I stretched first. That's how I hurt myself.'

Gardening Calendar: January - The Snow will be deep now...get out into the garden...

'This wine is dreadful - try some.'

'I found the home maintenance manual in the attic. I think it's got mildew.'

"You are still here."

"It's hard being a grownup, too – did you know we have absolutely zero limits on treats?"

"Oooh, I know what I want to be when I grow up: Retired!"

"Despite thoroughly scraping the celebrity barrel, that Orwellian nightmare Celebrity Big Brother is back on our screens again."

The Hammer

Madame ZuZu. Dream Interpretation. Tarot. Palms. She says the dream where I'm taking a test naked means I barely made it through school.

Public footpath on a desert island.

"The candy on the pillow is a nicety of the house."

"Ah...summer...and umbrellas as far as you can see...it reminds me of England!"

Anti-inflammation recipes

"The way you look at me, Craig... you really see me."

'Where Are They Now?'

'Henry was an undecided voter four years ago when he entered that voting booth, and I'm still waiting for him to decide and come home.'

Honest Voting Stickers

The Monroe Doctrine

Before disposing of useless information please make file copies.

Evil Henchman Gets a Promotion.

'You're a good man, Henderson, but you don't have your staff's respect.'

Think tanks.

Suggestions and Cheap Shots.

Infection Control Center. Now Hiring. I should have said "I'm not afraid of hard work" rather than "I don't mind getting my hands dirty."

Help! Send fishing tackle!

Only in America

"I'll have dessert first."

Our large economy size packet hasn't been selling...it's too big to carry home.

"It says 'Click here to enlarge.'"