Ethics Panel Member Gifts

"We need to make some cuts. We'll start with integrity, accountability, openness, and transparency."

Squeezing the Free Press.

"Excellent, excellent. A fine blend of truths, half-truths, and blatant falsehoods."

"In case something happens during the surgery and you become incapacitated, have you designated someone to make poor life choices on your behalf?"

'It's another corporate lawyer...do we want to buy a soul?'

Stoneage business ethics: 'But, hey, this 'ethics' stuff isn't carved in stone!'

'What I lack in cognitive flexibility, I make up for in moral flexibility.'

'We're getting back to first principles...which means we're going to have some.'

The continuing adventures of Rex, Washington DC insider.

"Whoa! Back up a second... 'R & D' stands for 'Research & Development?' We always thought it meant 'Rip-off & Distribute!'"

"If anything else, it beats bending over!"

'Now you see, that's EXACTLY what we should try to avoid here.'

Anonymous Donations

"Went in for a simple blood test and got cloned by mistake."

"At this point, we know it's addictive."

'Now, at first glance, this may LOOK like a challenge.'

'And get this: just when I thought the worst was over, the media blasts me for 'opportunistic, predatory business tactics!' Boy, did THAT sting!'

Arms Industry increases sales by 8.5%

'Office of P.G.Barley and Clones'

Corruption trial in the Vatican

"We need to make some cuts. We'll start with integrity, accountability, openness, and transparency."

Nasty, Shady, and Gruesome equal Massive potential profits

"I pride myself on being able to walk that fine line between misdemeanor and felony."

'The idea of being cloned with a human being appals me..!'

"Some people say you can't put a price on a wife's twenty-seven years of loyalty and devotion. They're wrong."

"Let's never forget that the public's desire for transparency has to be balanced by our need for concealment."

'Human clinical trials start in six months. Sooner if we run out of mice.'

30% Heredity, 70% Environment

Biblical Jewish Medical Ethics

'Someone calling himself a bio-ethicist is here to see you.'

'Right here is where we adopted the practice of price gouging.'

"I may have waffled, but I never lip-synched."