Ethical Experiment Enthusiast Gifts

'Sometimes I wish they'd just test vaccines on us.'

Lab test patients.

Ethics exam cheater.

"To torture an insect or not to torture an insect, that is the question."

Squeezing the Free Press.

Others will fight for you

'You'll like this, gang ? it's an 'eyes-only' list of 'shady-but-tolerated' loopholes allowed by the Securities and Exchange Commission.'

"I guess it's ethical. Let me run it through my 'Ethics Check' app."

"It's a memo from the legal department reminding us to (heh-heh), 'keep our noses clean'."

Uncle demonstrating chemical experiments to children

"I'm not having it if it's been genetically modified."

'If he grabs the broccoli, we turn on the Raffi tunes. If he heads towards the Playstation, he hit him with the air horn at 100db.'

"In a further effort to increase profits, control costs and satisfy shareholders, we've decided to steal stuff."

"I am not asking for directions."

'Let's agree to dispense with the rules of nomenclature and call it compound X.'

'You won't believe this, but even if the vaccine works, they wont give it to other sick mice.'

'We call it the 'Tomato Surprise' because the chef tinkered with the DNA a little.'

"Moulting"

"Hi, Bob - your consultants have just arrived."

"Take special note of the change to our policy on honesty."

'You're in luck. Business ethics is a gray area.'

Stoneage business ethics: 'But, hey, this 'ethics' stuff isn't carved in stone!'

"Just a harmless little genetic experiment," they said. Yeah, right...

Experience is important, so I'm inclined to leave questions of ethics to those who have them.

'Well, well - this should create a nice little wave of panic and hysteria.'

'Think, son! What was that formula you fed that tree?!'

Tragically Moses didn't see the eleventh commandment.

'Isn't that a little extreme? - Cloning yourself just so you can use the carpool lane?'

'Bad man. . . you are a Bad Man!'

These drug will cost you an arm and a leg...the good news is, my wife and I own stock in the company that makes them.

'I don't KNOW what I'm doing -- this is pure research!'

'What'll I do with the nuclear wastes?'

"Essentially Wilkins proves things and Brenner disproves them."

'Now you see, that's EXACTLY what we should try to avoid here.'

An angry Scientist has discovered his two Lab' mice are using a GPS to find their way through a maze to some cheese.