Ethical Coach Gifts

"Ladies first. Actually, it's safety first. But ladies are definitely a close second."

Slavery Reparations

'There's too much corruption in the third world.'

"Sorry, we don't hire people with a history of whistle blowing."

Stoneage business ethics: 'But, hey, this 'ethics' stuff isn't carved in stone!'

"No, no, that’s in a bar, Mr. President — you can talk politics and religion here."

"Well here's my idea: Why don't we try serving better coffee than them?"

"Whoa! Back up a second... 'R & D' stands for 'Research & Development?' We always thought it meant 'Rip-off & Distribute!'"

'Now you see, that's EXACTLY what we should try to avoid here.'

'Don't get up!'

'One year of obedience school and he still doesn't know which one is the dessert fork.'

Greeting card section: 'thank you' and 'you're welcome'.

'Dear Miss Etiquette, I'm never sure if I should say anything...'

"Honestly, doing the right thing is going to be a big change for us."

Sportswasher's

'We're able to cut back on legal fees by being more ethical.'

'I don't care if you are the CEO of a large oil company, you can't claim your soul as a business loss.'

'Now, at first glance, this may LOOK like a challenge.'

Politeness opens doors

"Right, I'd better go...corpses on't pick themselves clean y'know!"

Nasty, Shady, and Gruesome equal Massive potential profits

'And get this: just when I thought the worst was over, the media blasts me for 'opportunistic, predatory business tactics!' Boy, did THAT sting!'

"I suppose it's too late to start testing on animals?"

"This is Jim's second speech on how not to make people mad by talking on your phone. I missed his first speech."

"My company sells military goods and information to unsavory characters around the world, and donates 100% of our profits to local charities!"

"I'm not trying to change you. That's the personal trainer I hired's job."

Free-range C.E.O.s

"I can never remember, how much do we tip?"

"Tell him I can still hear him chewing."

An early encounter between progressive management philosophy and the law of the jungle.

A gentleman giving some children a lesson in manners

Have a nice day, if you are already having a nice day please disregard this notice. (reading letter at mailbox)

"You rang, m'lord?"