Estimator Gifts

'Well, maybe upteen zillion was too general a cost estimate.'

Corbin The Esitmator

Adult Courses. It's so hard keeping the information from different classes separate! I'm talking film history and psychology. I failed a test because I said a "psychopath" is the walkway Norman Bates took home. I also confused geography and aeronautics. I said the "great plains" are located at an Air Force testing base in the California desert. My worst nightmare was confusing the thinks ti learned in driver's education and statistics. But at least I now know it's driving where you must st

"I'd say we were pretty much on target."

Fear/Knowledge

"Stephen and I are today's special."

"The menu just says fried fish, but may I give you a more compelling, surprisingly lyrical description?"

"Waitress, have you smoked salmon..?"

'According to our statistics department, 78.93 of the statistics they produce are worthless.'

"Christmas - what a fuss eh?"

"Right about here there was a flattening of the curve. . ."

"I'd like the garden salad with the blue cheese dressing, and my mother would like me married by age thirty."

"And I'll also take my steak raw thank you."

'A cheeky red?'

Give us a drink that says "we're in love." Oh no, not again. Today's Special. Latte + 1hr web $12.50. We're back together. We're celebrating. Give us my darling pudding pie's favorite drink. A cinnamon mocha latte with a peppermint lollipop swizzle stick. Excuse me?! That is not my favorite drink ... dear. My favorite drink is a cinnamon mocha latte with a spearmint lollipop swizzle stick ... dear. I am so sorry ... snookums. How could I have possibly been so heartless and thoughtless as to con

"Even the waiters here are organic."

Santa sits in front of computers with naughty data and nice data screens.

'How can we believe anything when we can disprove everything?'

The Life of Pi

"You said the cauliflower is locally grown – would you elaborate?"

'Do you have any catsup?'

Fast food. Even faster food

"He could have been the national bird, but that was a long, long time ago."

You want me to be a what? A hipster. My research shows caf

"The spoon, he ran away with the goddam spoon."

"You say your crème needs more Brulée?"

Careful, the plate's probably still hot.

"You owe me five bucks."

"I'll have the Investigator's Special."

Hello. I'm Ferdinand. I'll be monitoring the levels of bull at your table this evening. Menu. Menu.

"An actor, you say? Guess you caught the acting-like-a-waiter bug."

"Everything on our menu uses organic, locally sourced, graveyard-to-table ingredients."

"If i were to kiss you then there is a 17% probability that we might get married and that has a 24% likelihood that we'd have children with a 34% change of divorce...I'm not sure I can risk it."

"Actual results indicate that the statistical analysis of the data which projections were based on may have been wrong."

"Something's wrong with the broccoli. Please take it back to the kitchen and have it genetically modified."