Epic Journey Planner T-Shirts

"I got super baked in the shire and accidentally recruited these four little weirdos for the most important mission of all time."

Odysseus returns to the Laundromat

Tourists

"Are we going for suntan, personal development or being the envy of our friends on Instagram?"

Man packing suitcase with French vocabulary

Duck Hunt

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a MAP, actually."

'Next year I'm hiring a tank!'

'Are we broke yet?'

'We don't know which gate flight 311 to Denver is boarding. These are the menus.'

'We would like an unspoiled paradise, but with lots of shops.'

An alleyway leads to a scenic area.

BIG BOOK OF CAMPER VAN NAMES

"For the last time, we never need the route with the fewest turns."

"No matter what, sleep when the bay sleeps."

Planned service changes

'Not gruel, stupid! -- I said find the GRAIL!'

"I think I found a location for our vacation."

'You're going on a long journey. Have you got an OAP's bus pass?'

"We were thinking about the Himalayas this summer. On the other hand, there's something very special about Montauk."

"She said 'let's go for a walk in the park'. It turned into a quagmire."

You have a major fiasco at 10:30, followed by a shocking scandal at 2:15.

'People are staring at us because they've never seen private box seats at an off broadway theatre before.'

"Will you be flying through to Toledo, or attempting to leave mid-air?"

'Some action figures! - They just STAND there!'

Face it, Bob, we're lost. Welcome to Faceitbobwe'relost pop. 2.

A mental-health spot quiz, Al: "A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single … Google search of travel websites"?

'We leave for France tomorrow. I just can't wait to visit all those famous museum gift shops!'

'Yes, It's in that direction.'

"Have you decided where to travel?"

"Where should we fly to for our next vacation?"

"Help! It's a sprawling epic!"

"Mabel, you are becoming a control freak..."

'A sea view would be nice-Black Sea for him,Red Sea for me!'

'The Federal Government today issued an order to American citizens to stay out of countries whose names begin with a 'B'....'