Adventure Planner T-Shirts

"Are we going for suntan, personal development or being the envy of our friends on Instagram?"

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a MAP, actually."

"We're looking for a five star hotel with excellent restaurants, facilities, transport and local attractions, but no tourists."

"We want a good selection of hotels restaurants and activities...but no tourists!"

"We're just planning our journey."

Planned service changes

Mermaids of the Dead Sea

'This is your Captain, we apologize for the breakdown in our air conditioning system...'

Returning tourism

"Here is a folder with your itinerary, visas and pre-paid coupons for your four-star hotel nests along the way: happy migration!"

"Instead of getting a job this summer, I'm buying 50 lottery tickets every week."

Excess Baggage: At times the cheapest ticket deals leave a lot to be desired.

"I thought of retiring. Then I looked at her bucket list, she looked at my bucket list, and we couldn't afford it."

'Yes, It's in that direction.'

'That was a good idea of yours to make ourselves scarce, the price of honey is going through the roof. I am going to cash in and get myself a nice little hive in Ibiza.'

'Psst, we're making a break for it on Tuesday, you guys in?'

'It looked bigger in the holiday brochure.'

"Can you suggest some place where the dollar goes far but they don't want to kill us?"

Tourists

"I got super baked in the shire and accidentally recruited these four little weirdos for the most important mission of all time."

Duck Hunt

Man packing suitcase with French vocabulary

'Next year I'm hiring a tank!'

'Are we broke yet?'

'We don't know which gate flight 311 to Denver is boarding. These are the menus.'

'We would like an unspoiled paradise, but with lots of shops.'

An alleyway leads to a scenic area.

"No matter what, sleep when the bay sleeps."

"For the last time, we never need the route with the fewest turns."

'You're going on a long journey. Have you got an OAP's bus pass?'

"She said 'let's go for a walk in the park'. It turned into a quagmire."

"We were thinking about the Himalayas this summer. On the other hand, there's something very special about Montauk."

"I think I found a location for our vacation."

You have a major fiasco at 10:30, followed by a shocking scandal at 2:15.

'Some action figures! - They just STAND there!'