Environmental Satire Lovers Gifts

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: Whaling

'To help save the environment, I've replaced all of our lightbulbs with compact fluorescents. Now I'm running the old ones over to the landfill...'

How life on Earth really got its start.

"We're standing in forever chemicals."

"The Nominees"

Vulture proclaims its love for highways.

Tomorrow's world 2165.

'So, that's where the blue water comes from!'

"I pose as a concerned citizen, but honestly I wouldn't miss the golden marmoset if it did become extinct."

"We have to get out of here! They're saying boil ALL water!"

Have our P.R. people do a report on the beneficial effects of cyanide on river life.

Another hot flash?

"I'm an optimist. I have every confidence that global warming will be nullified by nuclear winter."

'My father carried this sign before me, as did his father before him.'

"There - now we're environmentally responsible."

Granny's 100% All Natural Radioactive Waste

New uses for excess coal

"Venice! What will climate change think of next?"

'He's going to a better place . . . possibly to power an '86 jetta.'

'Please inform groundskeeping that the green space is invading my personal space.'

Acme Coffee Co.

The Ultimate Green Office!

'It's a very common plant on earth.'

Even with record Antarctic sea ice, nature finds ways to survive....

"Now we know what happens when we overachieve the climate goals."

"And if what they say about global warming is true you should have year round use of the pool by 2075."

"I don't care about the pollution... you can't deliver babies dressed like that."

"Killing the environment with sackfuls of gift tat, i-gadgets, single-use packaging, and novelty socks - anything other than: 'Ho-Ho-Ho!' to add to your defense?"

'A long time ago we couldn't breathe their atmosphere..now it's really great!'

The Beaver Viper, found mainly in Canada, stuns its prey with a barrage of probing questions and devours the hapless beaver mid thought.

'That's the Government for you every time.'

'We're polluting our ozone. Our icecaps are getting bigger, the oceans are shrinking....All because of our addiction to oxygen!'

Fake ecologist

"Mrs. Santa Claus wants a divorce, the elves in my workshop is on strike, the reindeer just hate me and global warming makes my place in the North Pole melt!"

'This is a sample of the dolphin skin we're using to bind the sustainability report.'