Environmental Policies Gifts

'It's an EIEIO!'

'Apparently you haven't heard, Hawkins, about things going paperless!'

'Now we have the chief executive of Wigwam rail, how can you justify the enormous fair increases.'

"On a more positive note the guidance we’ve published on the services we can’t provide is published in 37 different languages."

"Obama didn’t get to name a Supreme Court justice during his final year. So how come Trump does?"

"Good boy."

Foreign Markets with Big Barriers

US Immigration and Naturalization Service: If you're yearning to breath free...Get Out.

'It's not easy being green on grass!'

'Let's just wait here until the federal stimulus returns.'

'I've been called some mean things as a baby boomer, but 'Pig in the Python' really hurts.'

"Gas. Regular. Premium. Super. You don’t want to know."

'Well, kids, it all started with a massive Federal program to combat global warming....'

Our Two Parties, Explained

Trump leaving

It's a new government directive requiring us to be 58% more cheerful within 18 months.

Think Tank

Matryoshka/ Russian Gas Cylinders

'The recession is over, again.'

Economy

Roe v. Wade

"That's not a knife crime initiative. That's a knife crime initiative!"

"The date protection policy is all about access to information, and we all know information is POWER!"

'Not a word to Alfred, but the spare bedroom is worth losing the fourteen pounds!'

Sybil Obama

"We may have to rob from the rich AND the poor."

"Take special note of the change to our policy on honesty."

"No coal here, either - but you never know until you look."

"At least, everybody's agreed about the next summit's name!"

'Staffers don't report we're managing decline. They report we met our targets and did out job!'

"The Nominees"

Bureau of Disappearing Civil Liberties.

Keep the econoimy moving

"I liked it better when it was 'don't ask, don't tell the New York Times'."

Pre-Old Blues