Environmental Jester Gifts

This Junk Mail made from 75% Recycled Other Junk Mail.

The runner ducks ate all the snails from the garden and Jack was happy but then...

"Is he talking yet? I was hoping he could help me with my new phone."

Don't be fooled by the theatrics. She'll only suck your sap!

'Say low-cholesterol dairy-free alternative to cheese!'

"Once upon a time there was a kind bank manager who found all the money lost in the global financial meltdown, brought world peace, stopped global warming, cured the common cold and discovered Julian Assange is Santa."

Man Tries Use Telescope In Observatory As Cannon.

"Yep, it says "pesticide"! Not only are they trying to kill us, they also insult us by calling us pests!"

Tom, you may not want to pause so long at the top of your swing.

'... so I decided to make us all fabulous new outfits from the Guardian environment supplement!'

"You're not helping the methane problem, you know."

The nuclear power plant didn't doom the Snail Darter as feared.

Thanks to a generous grant from the oil companies, scientists discover the real reason glaciers are melting.

Vegetarian restaurant: 'Two vegetarians please.'

'This should shake things up -- I've just found conclusive evidence that global warming is caused by whales!'

Finish Annual IOK Grunion Run

'Why are you watching TV with the lights off?'

'You want to become a vegan?... Well okay, but you do realise there'll be nothing lower than you on the food chain?'

'Could you cut down the CO2? The ice is getting a bit thin.'

Watering a plant in the rain.

Mr. Science Times

"Ruddy Japanese knotweed gets EVERYWHERE."

"Here, try this anti-dandruff fertiliser my gardener recommended."

Tonight's topic: Global warming.

Cow Printer

"As part of our environmental policy we burn compliance to heat the system."

'Nobody said anything about a bagpipe ban.'

I'd like to check my e-mail...

'I jogged 120 miles last month and drank 3 gallons of wine. At 40 mpg, I'm doing more than my share for the energy crisis.'

'GIT!!!'

Computer cables as fire ladder.

COWS: Cow Carrot Incentive Error

Genetics Department Christmas Dinner

Common tactical errors made by novice computer chess players: putting the pieces directly in the disk drive.