Enthusiast Of Cultural Humor Gifts

'No, I'm not English. I'm Danish. It's just that I'm dyslexic.'

"Hic. Gosh and begorrah!" "Wha?"

Palms. When fully grown that species will provide some nice shade in your your yard. Fronds with benefits.

'Yes, all at once!'

"What the...They wrapped me in toilet paper!"

"Fangul." Italian sausage.

Government survey into the effects of haggis throwing in Ethiopia.

The Scottish Lawn

Elephant and Castle

"When did this game get started?"

Cover story: Plant World.

Technical Terms Explained: Suckers.

"Hey, Zorro! You forgot your mask."

"We don't have knock-knock jokes on Christmas."

'I was tired of my goaty, so I decided to grow a moustache...'

"We can do this the easy way, or we can do this the hard way."

"Wow yes, it's a lovely garden, but I can only see flowers: not a carrot in sight..."

'Ok, ok, what about this one? There was an Irishman, an Italian and an Englishman ..'

"Aren't those dead flowers fake?"

'Ma, have you been reading my textbook?'

'What do you mean you're a vegetarian?'

'You're lucky-you've the knees for it.'

Three Circles of Gardener's Hell.

Irish Jig Saws

'Hi. I'm Rabbi Feldman, and I'll be your mohel this evening.'

Early Americans found it easier to settle the west coast, where natives were, like, whatever, dude.

'Scottish Arts Council? I'm looking for sponsorship to help me sit through a performance of Gotterdammerung.'

Monstrosa Impressus

Pot Needles

'It's the law of the puszta, son. Them tripping on a banana skin, that's funny. Us tripping on a banana skin, that's a conspiracy!'

"Sure, we live in a cave but do we have to dress like we live in a cave?"

'Don't you mean rubbish; we're in England!'

Green Fingers.

'Nah, I think your one should be called hand egg.'

'But Steve, it still doesn't make you kosher!'