Entertainment Emperor Gifts

Remote controlled jester.

"Do you see yourself becoming a movie in five years?"

Uncle demonstrating chemical experiments to children

'No, your guess isn't as good as mine.'

"Extreme miming"

"Remember, money is only a tool - to make more money."

'I know my resume makes me seem overtrained, but I really wasn't paying attention.'

"The new revenue stream is finally kicking in."

"Well, if you hadn't misfiled it in the first place it wouldn't have been lost."

"I've heard this airline's got some unusual inflight entertainment."

A Clown pretends to put his head in the mouth of a TV lion.

'They're only interested in computer generated mammoths.' (Theatrical Agent).

'It's not dead, honey. You've just never seen it turned off before.'

Bear Juggling Penguins.

Eager to get back out but want to limit your exposure? Come to Barry's barbershop, restaurant, gym 'n cinema.

Don't touch that dial! — We're experts, and we know what you should be watching!

"The script is flimsy, the action scenes implausible and the plot would insult the intelligence of a three year old."

Pottery Slam

'We've got a 50 inch hd lcd 3d t.v with 200 channels and there's nothing on.'

"California has always been too big for its britches."

Roller Coasters

"Hear me out. Batman - again."

"Now that I can watch whatever I want, whenever I want, my life has no structure."

Trustworthy Authority.

Man asking what is a stall at the opera

Getting to Know You

'We were made for each other...we hate the same TV shows.'

'It's a new reality show call 'Detoxing with the Stars'...'

'We need a report on Ageism. Kelly, could you do that?'

Ricky Gervais.

News of the Day - Dissolution - 'Will it Break? Will it not break?'

The scourge of the 'burbs, cable pirates board another innocent hom in their unceasing search for that one extra channel, the occasional first-run movie, or the highly-prized pay-per-view sports events..

Hollywood on Strike

There's the pay TV remote, the set top box remote, the TV remote...now where did I put the worth watching remote?

'Frankly, we keep you around for entertainment value.'