Emperor Gifts

"Still, It's better than his elephant idea"

'Don't look at me like that! You're the one who wanted to live in a bouncy castle!'

'This vacation, let's go on something OTHER than a power trip.'

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: Dead Cat Crown Jewels

British Prime Minister

"'Conquer Spain'? 'Balance the budget'? 'Reform the justice system'? -- You call this a honey-do list?"

'The Ambassador will not be pleased, Madame.'

'Frankincense, dummy! I asked for frankincense!'

It started friendly enough...'I'm Henry VIII, my dear, but you may call me 'Hank'.'

"Is this the same gold bar I gave you last year?"

'Your Grandpa achieved greatness, he thrust greatness upon me, and then you were born great!'

'No, you can't play poker tonight! The last time you played, you lost Schewig-Holstein!'

'Theaters from Hell' 'We have no sound engineers, so no there's not a good seat in the house.'

"Don't worry, princess, I'm sure one day your Mr. Divine Right will come along."

''Depression'? -- You or the country or both?'

Gracie for Queen...of the universe.

"Yes, but you were the defender of the wrong faith."

"I have to admit. You talked a good game."

"Of all the labour saving devices invented in the last 70 years, this is one's favourite."

"Hail, Caesar! The barbarians have been beaten back, and Rome is still Numero Uno."

Nato Membership

Chief Foreign Policy Advisor to President Obama.

Diplomacy Between Cuba and US

King completes rubik's cube.

'Could you scoot your chair over this way a little dear?'

(Mother Goose: playboy's Mirthful Master of the Macabre serves Up Some Strange Twists On a Clutch of Children's Classics.) "Is this supposed to be somebody's idea of a joke?"

The Royal Wii.

'Between you and me Wizard, is it true that you intellectuals have pointed heads?'

'He just outlawed his in-laws.'

'Theaters from Hell.' 'We have no sound engineers, so no there's not a good seat in the house.'

'You can scratch your back when the war is over!'

"It's either this or a country run by lawyers."

"Mr. Macron, Mr. Draghi. Welcome to Kiev! Why didn't you bring Mr. Scholz with you?"

The Further Temptations of Kenneth Starr

'This is great! -- I should have thought of tax simplification years ago!'