Enjoyment Of Satire Gifts

"Would you say that the sales projections in your 3 year plan are realistic?"

Beckett for Beginners: "Waiting for Thumbkin"

"She's a show dog...purebred, of course." "That's great! My guy's a Sanskrit scholar...wrote for the Harvard Lampoon."

"Do Mr. Reaper, do you have health insurance?"

Official Fight Cards

Bureaucracy gone mad!

'What makes you think I want a trophy wife?'

"Actually, I think it's a cluster of SCUD missiles heading our way!"

'Probably giving evidence at some sort of industrial tribunal....heh!'

'Upon further review, the pig did not have control of the ball prior to being eaten...'

Family Butcher.

"I hate weddings. They make me feel a momentary lapse of cynicism."

The Modern Damocles -

The trap

The Unknown Philosopher, who first realised life is no picnic.

Peace bomb.

Corporate Punishment.

ENNUI...(smiley face).

"Maybe I will and maybe I won't - You're not prejudiced against transvestites, are you?"

Come and have a go if you think you're hard enough...

Bureau of Missing Door Knobs

Knights of the Round Whatever

"First of all, kudos on landing a corner office."

'It's good you called me when you did, Bill. Believe it or not, a little speed-bump like this can derail a perfectly good career if it isn't handled just right!'

"Do we wait for it to be approved as an antibiotic, or do we go ahead right now and sell it as furniture polish?"

Well done, Harris. That's one of the straightest paperclips I've ever seen.

John Banville

"I know I say it in every episode, Carson, but the world is changing and we have to change with it."

Art Vandalism

"Thanks a bunch. I'll just run these by our committee and pass them along."

This would be Andy's first and last day as golf instructor at Sunset Oaks Country Club: "Remember, *hic*....Always jerk your head up and swing at the ball as hard as you can."