Email Investigative Detective Gifts

"I received your email, but it's missing the link."

'I remember when you used to look for answers using your astute powers of deduction.'

"Actual results indicate that the statistical analysis of the data which projections were based on may have been wrong."

Alternative Medicine

"..Your analysis and medication would be perfect if you were a goat."

'See, dear, you can't believe everything you read. It says so right here on the internet!'

The new Physics

Says here the Navy's going to be patrolling the South China Sea. It could spark a history-changing war. Google tells me the last time a Naval conflict changed history, it was the Battle of Midway. You were alive at that time. How awesome was it to already be ancient when Midway happened? I never expected a question like that from a prepubescent stooge like you. Was it as awesome as when you saw Cleopatra lose at the Battle of Actium? I see you're bringing Google's a-game today.

"Didn't I warn you about buying medication from the internet?!"

"I only told a few friends."

I'd like a second opinion on your self-diagnosis - So a random guy from the waiting room is googling your symptoms.

"Yes, I'm a superhero. I'm not attractive, muscular or charming because I work in the 'cyber crimes' division."

"If this is secret information the government doesn't want us to know, how come we can read about it on facebook?"

Spam traps on mobiles

"They'll never guess how we stole their data."

"The tweet you posted last night struck a chord around the world, united all factions, and basically altered the course of humanity."

'You have a harmless but highly irritating form of nervous disorder we call D.Y.I. - Diagnosing Yourself on the Internet.'

The Darknet starts right here.

"Jeez, Alice, at least Google him first."

"So in other words, we're hoping to discover what makes the nitty, gritty."

"You arrive early, You work hard, You stay focused. What's your game?"

'Take a look at this everyone - it just could be the signature we've been looking for.'

"What's the word I'm looking for?" "What's the word I'm looking for?" "What's the word I'm looking for?"

"People are always whining about food labelling, but there's NOTHING that ANYONE with a reasonable chemistry degree and maybe a PhD in pharmacology wouldn't with a little effort, be able to understand....At least a little."

Berlitz guide to Scamese

Psychiatry. Why go on a voyage of self-discovery when I can just Google myself?

"That's not what it says on the Web."

Doctor, I looked up my symptoms on the internet and I think I might be dead. Don't believe everything you read on the net.

"You've always been a poor listener Harold."

'Four out of five websites disagree with your diagnosis.'

"I already know he's gone — it's been on the Internet."

"Your internet researched analysis of your condition and treatment is impressive,and it would be 100% on target...if you were a goat!"

"When we went inside the numbers, we found goo."

Information and Still don't get it.

"Hello?"