Elderly Escapaders Gifts

Road rage on a mobility scooter.

"One year closer to college!"

Albert & Myra - The End Story

Inside One's Memory Bank

'Unfortunately, there's no cure. It's called growing older.'

'This is you, enlarged.'

Duel in a wheelchair.

"Mom said Dad pulled a groin surfing Mendocino. When will he realize he's not 60 anymore?"

"I won't have anything to worry about when I grow up."

"O.K., one last big rhubarb score. But then I'm out of the pie game for good."

The Great Pyramid of Geezers

'This is as close to a round up I'll ever get.'

"It seems like only yesterday I was on the verge of getting it all together."

Women

Death skis towards a man fishing on cracking ice

"I'm at the age where work is a lot less fun, and fun is a lot more work."

'Hurry up and enjoy your life as a pensioner! Three.. Two.. One..'

"Now that the playground's thawed, let's welcome back Mary Redmond, Sarah Turpin, and Hector D'Amico."

When Seniors Fly

"...At what point do hemorrhoids become 'just another hobby?'"

"You look good for your age."

Mountain escalator.

'Would you like to eat in the restaurant or dine outside on our Wasp-atorium?'

'I forgot to tell you Neddy's not 'broken-in' yet...!'

'Honey! Hurry and help me bar the door! I saw a bunch of rowdy senior citizens in parrot masks down by the arena!'

Period Of Transition

"I signed up for 'Dressage Without the Horse.'"

"I think she's the new nurse. She's been here ever since I can remember."

"He's auditioning for a part in 'Conan The Octagenarian'."

Seniors Pro (putt putt) Golf Tour.

'How can we grow old together when I age seven times faster than you?'

"I have headaches, stomach, pains, aching muscles, back pains, creaking joints, nausea and dry eyes."

'Hello Angus...I didn't recognise you.'

'You'll never convince me that phone masts aren't a health risk.'

"Honey, don't engage."