Ego Wrangler T-Shirts

"This is Ritz Rose, substituting for the vastly over rated Ed Yomp..."

High Riders of the Old West

"Excuse me, but I believe you are in my seat."

"I've outgrown my backpack."

"I'm afraid he left everything to charity... Oh, I see. I take it your name's Charity?"

"The good news is we've used up all our bad ideas."

Gardener's Calendar: Try to put the other things back...

"How'd I do on the test?"

'Hold on there Jethro! You know I don't tolerate that kind of horseplay in this joint.'

"It's good you feel ready to confront your demons. Unfortunately, they're reluctant to face you."

'Thanks for throwing out your ideas, Perkson, but I have to throw them out too.'

'Did you want me, boss?'

'Any stunt driving experience other than teaching three teen-agers to drive?'

"What's the problem Cowboy? Never heard of Cattle Driving before?"

Mr Tom Noddy's First Day With the Hounds Pt. 1

Raccoons! Single file into the crate! Snake! Back in your hole! Crickets! Keep it down! Animal Control Freak.

Women shopping with children in the trolley.

"That reminds me, we must sort out your will."

Christo's greatest challenge.

For the first time in his Jeffery felt small-minded.

That's it...It's official. It's now an art installation!

'Dang, we're losing a lot of strays.'

"I need to take a call. Argue amongst yourselves."

"It's broken I'm afraid." "Will I be able to work?" "Depends. What do you do?" "Oh, I'm just a cowpoke for Circle 'Y' Ranch."

Happy Birthday MUM!

"No one is making you do anything you don't want. I'm just saying we're all headed for Dodge City and we think you should come along."

'Where do you see yourself not getting tenure in seven years?'

'Our name is Leylandii and we're the neighbours from Hell!'

'But we can't go to Australia for our honeymoon, you know how my Mother hates flying!'

"Being a post-doc for thirty years can really screw up your life."

'Wow, I used to be a Master of the Universe too!'

Writer's Block

"Looks like we'll be walking today. The horses are staging a sit in."

Before baseball, raccooning enjoyed a brief stint as the national pastime.

'Dude, according to the strategy guide, you shouldn't defeact Gixaglime and open the gate to Axesworld, or else! I wonder what they mean by or else?'