Eggcellent Humorist Gifts

The Rooster Comedian.

Honest Vending

"The Eggsorcist"

"Don't worry, Miss. I'll soon get the hang of it."

'We have three minutes left.'

'You're supposed to bring the newspaper to ME!'

"It's no good, Bertie—we must either find some other place to meet or break off the affair altogether."

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'And I thought I had a big egg to lay.'

The mysterious ancient stone figures of Keister Island.

'Frankly, if all the King's men couldn't put him together again, what chance do we have?...'

'First give me the food - then you get the egg.'

Champagne at the hunt

"It makes sense when you see the second painting with the lego."

"I'm more interested in hearing about the eggs you're hiding from yourself."

"It's not my fault - how was I to know you'd look scary with your clothes off?"

Artist uses connect-the-dots canvas to paint nude model.

'In case of emergency, break glass.'

"So, Owen tells me you guys met in art school."

Nude conductor of Orchestra conducting 'The full Monte-verdi'

"Gracie, you're a good mud artist."

'Just because the alignment of the system wasn't maintained during rapid sample exchange, it's no threat to your manhood.'

"Well, it's a simple enough work contract: as long as you produce eggs, the farmer will feed you..."

Poser

"Now carefully flip one side of the omelette..."

"Rapunzel? Rapunzel moved out years ago. I'm Bruce, and I have a stack of old newspaper clippings I'd like to show you."

'It says this artist is making a statement about man's struggle with the rising cost of oil paint.'

"I'm waiting in for a plumber."

'How the heck is anyone supposed to lay with all this chitchat going on?'

Mum, Dad, I've met something...

'Come quick, Mrs. Dumpty! Your son fell off the wall!'

Russian eggs.

A hen paninting her eggs with egg-shell paint

Artist, sitting in front of a sign identifying a bridge as a draw bridge, draws the bridge.