Egg-celent Humorist Gifts

'I've been sitting on it for days and days and nothing happens!'

A bowling pin shaped chicken has lined up her eggs in a bowling pin formation.

"So tell me, what is it about your life that isn't making sense to you?"

'Put an egg in the bowl and beat it with the whisk.'

'We have three minutes left.'

'And I thought I had a big egg to lay.'

'First give me the food - then you get the egg.'

'Frankly, if all the King's men couldn't put him together again, what chance do we have?...'

Humpty Dumpty in Occupational Therapy

'Honey, the babysitter's here.'

"I'm more interested in hearing about the eggs you're hiding from yourself."

'So tell me, what is it about your life that isn't making sense to you.'

No Poaching! Scrambling, Frying or Boiling.

"Well, it's a simple enough work contract: as long as you produce eggs, the farmer will feed you..."

Meet the layer.

"Funny-all the king's horses don't seem to be helping at all."

'How the heck is anyone supposed to lay with all this chitchat going on?'

Russian eggs.

'Mom said I'd be a late bloomer, but this is ridiculous.'

Anti-litter by-law in effect

'Come quick, Mrs. Dumpty! Your son fell off the wall!'

How the Easter Bunny Spends Halloween.

'I have to face it Irma, I haven't laid an egg in a week now: I'm menopausal...'

A hen paninting her eggs with egg-shell paint

'Okay, I give up. What do you put in your cake recipe that tastes so familiar?'

I only lay egg whites.

Postman frying a parcel marked 'handle like eggs'.

'You're right chicken does come before the egg.'

'My first piece of advice is not to put all your eggs in one basket.'

IRS, 'Sorry, but you can't count them as dependents before they hatch.'

Hen notices egg and herself have crack .

Easter Bunny

'Yeah, I knew Dumpty, I let him take a fall for me, I thought he was hardboiled.'

How to live ecologically without wasting power.

'Mrs Dumpty, Humpty's up on the wall again.'