Egg-cellent Humor Lover Gifts

"I'm more interested in hearing about the eggs you're hiding from yourself."

"Well, it's a simple enough work contract: as long as you produce eggs, the farmer will feed you..."

"Constipated."

'We have three minutes left.'

'And I thought I had a big egg to lay.'

'First give me the food - then you get the egg.'

'Frankly, if all the King's men couldn't put him together again, what chance do we have?...'

Humpty Dumpty in Occupational Therapy

'Honey, the babysitter's here.'

"I forgive you, Bumpty."

No Poaching! Scrambling, Frying or Boiling.

Meet the layer.

"Funny-all the king's horses don't seem to be helping at all."

'How the heck is anyone supposed to lay with all this chitchat going on?'

'Mom said I'd be a late bloomer, but this is ridiculous.'

Russian eggs.

'Come quick, Mrs. Dumpty! Your son fell off the wall!'

'I have to face it Irma, I haven't laid an egg in a week now: I'm menopausal...'

A hen paninting her eggs with egg-shell paint

'You're right chicken does come before the egg.'

Postman frying a parcel marked 'handle like eggs'.

'My first piece of advice is not to put all your eggs in one basket.'

IRS, 'Sorry, but you can't count them as dependents before they hatch.'

Hen notices egg and herself have crack .

Egg ghost stories.

Easter Bunny

'Yeah, I knew Dumpty, I let him take a fall for me, I thought he was hardboiled.'

How to live ecologically without wasting power.

'Mrs Dumpty, Humpty's up on the wall again.'

"Bond. Humpty Bond."

I told Humpty to go private.

'I've been sitting on it for days and days and nothing happens!'