Education Milestones Gifts

"Young lady, if your grades don't improve, I'm going to let your father sign up for TikTok."

"Sign my yearbook?"

'I know about the birds and the bees. Tell me about the bears and the bulls.'

"Oh indeed I did: I went feral for a year when I was young. It taught me a lot about the world, but about myself too..."

'I'm not happy with his latest school photo.'

"When did she start crawling?"

'I try not to think big too often or I get terrible headaches.'

Toy Shops and Educated Children

'Sure, I took your shovel. Ethics doesn't kick in for a year or two.'

His first conspiracy theory...'Is it a coincidence the first time I walk, they start locking all the cupboards? I think not!'

One!

'What do you mean 'theoretically'? Everything we do is theoretical.'

How's your nephew doing in human school this year? Great! He has a calculator and spell checker like last year, and this fall new features have been added. With new translation software he can take language classes now, and for social studies he just clicks "history." Bonjour! I'm so proud! He has the school's highest G.P.A.! Other students can't copy off him anymore because he started using encrypted code. His favorite upgrade is the enhanced ability to process school lunches. He's bee

After many years of wavering Dennis finally makes the decision to step out of his comfort zone.

"We just got our online schooling exam results..."

"Day 19,918: Once again, Gary cannot believe he's still alive."

'We think he has a future in politics.'

'I think you're ready for the big chair...'

"Don't be a dummy, Justin - You gotta learn your ABC's so you can Google stuff."

'Oh Darling, I'm so proud! I wish I could give you a big hug!'

"This birthday qualified him to be tapped as a fossil fuel reserve."

"Aren't you young to be worrying about college?"

"Mommy wants you to know where your food comes from."

'There's been no stopping him since he said his first word this morning!'

'What do you think you're up to?'

'He's feeling very proud of himself. He went to watchdog school and graduated 'Magna cum loudly.''

At 4 years old most kids can say easy straightforward sentences.

It was time for Junior to learn to fly.

"He's at grade level for everything except cursing. He's swearing at a 9th grade level."

'Yes, your son does ask questions in class but they're always 'Can I have the hall pass?'.'

"Great first glide son! Oh, by the way, remind me to teach you how to land tomorrow..."

'The good news I got an 'A' in School Lunch.'

"Can I call you back? I'm creating happy memories of my childhood for my father."

'Please sir, I did give you the correct answer. But, you gave me the wrong question.'

"My dad wants me to have all the things he never had, and he never had a pony."