Education Critique Lover Gifts

Honorary degrees for sale, $5 each.

Even Ordinary People Pay Bribes to Get Their Kids Into College

School Cafeteria. It's the start of the school year. The Geometry teacher will come by to verify that we're serving truly square meals. The grammar teacher says the alphabet soup is runny and needs some punctuation added. History teachers keep a record of all the past meals and so will notice any leftovers being served. And the computer lab staff expressed concern about all the cookies so the astronomy teacher suggested switching to candy for dessert. I'll bet she thinks Starburst and Milk

Toy Shops and Educated Children

Master's Degrees of the Universe

"Hold it right there! Our legislature is currently considering new measures to protect children from the insidious ravages of cell phones in schools!"

"I don't mind them counting the days 'til school's out, but I wish they wouldn't do it on their fingers."

Go to M.I.T., they said. You'll do great things, they said.

Where the hell did you get that brain ?

'My father says, these intelligence tests are biased towards the intelligent.'

"They make us learn reading, writing, and arithmetic to prepare us for a world of videotapes, computer terminals and calculators."

'Remind me again, Dad. Why did you want me to get that college degree?'

Cover Design for the Savoy (No. 7)- the Eternal Problem of Youth and Pedantry

Assuming That It Works

'Going to school is NOT an abusive relationship!'

'We think Rome was built at night sir, because last week you told us that Rome wasn't built in a day!'

"What did I learn in school today...I learned I don't like school!"

Dr. Roy G. Biv, Rainbowologist.

Phrenology head filled with National Curriculum instead of real knowledge.

Graduation at the executioner's school

'Dad said that experience is the best teacher, so I cut school and went to the video arcade.'

"Why do I have to work hard at school? I can buy a degree on the internet!"

Remembering the words of his 8th grade Algebra teacher, Moose bought his old middle school and made a mockery out of it.

Cutting Room Floor

"We should have more physics in the biology and chemistry curricula."

"The Feds have authorized me to leave your child behind."

Back to School.

'Sorry, kid...that's it.'

'He has an MBA from Wharton.'

"I see you graduated Summa Cum Laude, but then didn't your whole graduating class."

'If we could just get rid of a few of these lecturers and students, we'd have a great university on our hands.'

"Listen Smith, I don't care if the older boys are picking on you or not, you have to come into school - you're the deputy head for goodness sake!"

"Do you mind if I put this on instagram?"

"Do you realize that the only change we have had, in this school, is in our school telephone number?"

'Ms. Worden, please go to the library stacks and bring me a few education journals from the 70s. It seems everything old is new again.'