Economy Prankster Pillows

"The most important feature of economic predictions is trying not to laugh while making them."

"Gas. Regular. Premium. Super. You don’t want to know."

"The fish - will it be the market price at the time of ordering, the time of eating or the time of paying?"

"No, it hasn't, but when the sky does fall your investments are going to do very, very, well.''

A few Halloween costume ideas.

"We're a pharmaceutical company. We should be getting 'pharm' subsidies."

"I'm in here...reallocating Dad's retirement account into junk bonds."

'Great! Thanks to the damn mortage crisis, we've got to live in a neighbourhood now where we wake up with yellow feet every second morning...'

"We'll double our chances of recovery if we buy two lottery tickets."

Misfortune cookies

"...And when the world economy collapses, we all stand up and take over! Agreed?"

It's a nice apartment but I don't want to pay my share of the national debt for rent.

"Pearson is known for his austere monetary views."

"They call the dollar stable and you know what's in the stable."

'The bank want to be sure that I don't vanish and forget the loan repayment...'

"Is that a fixed-rate scowl or is it adjustable to the current interest rate?"

Department of Commerce, Economic Forecasting, Division of Estimates & Alibis

'I'm sorry, honey, but your dog Scraps has gone on to a better place now. I sold him to that family across the road with an inground pool.'

'You used to be an investment consultant, Fred -- what should I do with this quarter I found?'

"With these electricity prices we can't afford cooking anymore. Imagine eating sausage-favored popsicles."

'You have stock market fever.'

"With the downturn in your housing market Earth Scum! We would like to buy your planet!"

"I understand that you cannot support the whole economy, minister. I would be perfectly happy for you to support me!"

'The numbers should look better this quarter since they've been photoshopped.'

"The combined total of major-league batting averages was down three and a half points today. Outs outnumbered hits four to one, on a total of fourteen hundred at-bats."

'Prefer to say 'p*****g it back into the economy'.'

Man inflating a Sterling pound sign

'You said you were after a creative tax lawyer.'

'We're both collecting Social Security. But my husband supplements our income by losing money in the stock market.'

First Infidelity Investments

'Right, now put it all in my savings account.'

"Due to the high electricity price, you'll have to pay a 25 bucks deductible. As you will understand, I'd like to have it in advance."