Eco-conscious Marketer Gifts

Marketing in the Anthropocene Era: "Hey, it's basically just another branding challenge. How do we make the looming possibility of human extinction sexy?"

'I don't know what 'Natural' means either, but business is great!'

"I love this place—its food, its ambience, and its political goals."

'Can't they just switch to smaller barrels?'

'To help save the environment, I've replaced all of our lightbulbs with compact fluorescents. Now I'm running the old ones over to the landfill...'

"Stop summoning me about rising sea levels. I do costumed supervillains staling jewels, men in beanies grabbing handbags - that sort of thing."

Bee flying to another flower.

We're cutting the forest in half, so I'm going to need you to make the oxygen of two trees.

"We're odd looking but just as good."

"All this spinning...shouldn't this be charging our phones or something?"

"The homes in this area are beautiful."

The New Normal

"If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around, does it make a sound?"

A sign on the front lawn of a house reads "Keep off the chemicals".

'The environmental impact study is quite alarming, and this might just be the tip of the iceberg.'

"They've got me doing cosmetics research."

Price may vary with weather.

"It's a lot of work, but we've decided to renovate this old factory."

Dept. Sustainable Energy.

COP26

"I came to save you, but everything I can think to do seems like it wouldn't actually make that much of a difference."

"Plastic straws. No fish were spared in the making of this product."

"It's a good show, but I'm pretty sure it's a limited series."

"Well, you know what they say —'The water's always bluer on the other side of the trash fence.'"

From the Stone Age to the GarbAge.

"Secondhand books, reheated coffee"

Population train.

"It seems even the local council are aware of your drink problem."

"I can remember when water was just wet."

No one drinks from fountains anymore. Thanks to bottled water, they've been replaced. By bottled water fountains.

'That is some serious alternative energy.'

"hmm. Mother Nature's definitely trying to tell us something here."

Biofuel - a solution or...?

"Our target must be close enough to seem achievable, by far enough so we're not accountable."

BP vows to donate revenues from the blown-out oil well to wildlife rehabilitation.