Eccentric Gardener Gifts

Beware of Snake

"911?... Guinness Book of World Records?... 911?

Gardener clipping topiary stairs

Planting seeds in garden - broad beans and jelly beans.

Man cutting hedge next to two heads impaled on sticks. Signs beneath say 'You missed a bit' and 'You can do mine next'.

'The attendant is very good. I tip him the occasional sparrow.'

'Gosh, I dunno. You sure it's organic?'

Okay, dig that one up!

There's a Facebook group for everyone... "Even Toilet Paper Mummies!"

'I'm in the amusingly shaped vegetables department.'

"The pea's the first vegetable I've ever grown. Can you stuff and mount it for me please?"

'And if you squeeze snapdragons just like this, it sort of looks like they're biting something.'

"Here's the new smart plant...it tells you when you're overwatering it."

Planting Bird Seed.

The beautiful but deadly 'Venus dog trap'.

'He swallowed some of his acrylic paints and now he's artsy fartsy.'

City Zoo: 'Try our exotic composts in your garden.'

Mowing the Bottle-Garden

Farmer planting the next crop of PC's.

'What on earth made you think of growing water melons in the bath Henry?'

'You've never forgotten that Elsie Turner, have you George!'

Priest watering his wings.

Clown watering his flowers.

Football fan

'Sewer farm - 100% organic'

Bonsai farms: 'We started growing normal trees, but it didn't work out!'

Hipster Yard

"Why can't you just read in bed?"

'Well Miss Pearson, this flood resistant GM Maize you've developed is pure genius. Giving it gills was a masterstroke'

Pyramid Garden

"Charles! Enough with the mulch!"

Watering a plant in the rain.

'I borrowed Timmy's model plane to crop dust the garden.'

Man with a sunflower head watering flowers with human faces.

Woman Planting Flowers in her Snow Covered Garden.