Earthy Enthusiast T-Shirts

'I struck oil.'

"I'm not weird I'm a 'person of weirdness'."

Use your imagination.

"I brought back important data on that blue planet called Earth."

'The next piece contains sex, violence, and Homeric epithets.'

"It may not look like it to you, but trust me, he's hyperactive. It's exhausting!"

Tesseract of the D'Urbervilles.

"I'm still not sure if we've hired a creative genius or a complete cretin."

'Sorry mate. Your church doesn't meet the minimum building code.'

"Pat's independently wealthy and dependably entertaining."

"I brought you coffee. Sorry it’s cold."

"I've been working on this project non-stop, twenty four-six!"

'Honey, it's your worms of the month delivery!'

TV Watch(ing) Dog for sale.

"Your toilet water over ice, sir. And how is the homework?"

Sloth traffic jam.

'You think irritable fowl syndrome is bad? Just wait until you hit menopause.'

'Let's go around the room, and talk about the edgy, creative things we've done so far today.'

"She's passed out...quick! take her pulses!"

'I AM a three-toed sloth, but cartoonists always draw us with two toes.'

"If 'Slothra' takes any longer climbing to the top I'll have to land and refuel again."

A man emerges from a tree stump

'Junior is just a little confused.'

'I've been to seventh heaven many times, but this is my first experience with the real thing.'

Sloth Studios - "Lights! camera! inaction!"

Honey I'm Home

Homer

"Come at me, Bro!"

"Geoffrey's new year resolution was to give up self-respect."

Sigh. … I wish I had that kind of energy.

"He's nuts. She's nuts. All three young ones are nuts. The dog is nuts. And the old lady upstairs is nuts, too."

"Frankly, I could move a lot faster, but the truth is that I lack motivation..."

"No one quite knew what Bob did to earn a crust...rumour had it he was a biologist...with a special interest in sloths!"

The Tedious Adventures of Mr. Sloth...

'V. K. Duvine and Prodigal Son (if he comes back)