Early Morning Grump Gifts

'Please don't say a word to me until my coffee gets right...about...here.

'I had my attorney draw this up. It states that if I choose to rise, I don't necessarily have to shine.'

"Well, I'm thinking about boarding school. Though I'm not sure they accept adults."

Broken Alarm Clock.

'Wait! That's not one of your novelty slippers...that's the cat!'

'Looks like no Christmas bonus this year.'

'Did you use mouthwash this morning?'

The Cat's Alarm Clock

You have the worst spring breath.

"I know it's tough to get motivated on Mondays, but..."

'Next time you feel like keeping in touch, keep in touch with somebody else.'

'Misery is sleeping in late on Saturday morning then realizing it's only Wednesday...'

I am coffee and I need more coffee

Buzz. Go away. Buzz buzz. I'm up! The alarm clock always wants it more than you do.

'This may be the only time I'll ever bring you breakfast in bed - So wake up!'

"I much prefer the evening milking to the morning one: The farmer is not a "morning person", now is he?"

'Bonny, I've forgotten...What time is that 9 o'clock meeting tomorrow?...'

Moanathon.

"Here! Drink your coffee... Honestly, you can be such a bear in the morning!"

'If you get one who refuses to wake up, pour it in his lap.'

I'm going to hate myself in the morning, but I hate everything in the morning.

The morning show for people who HATE mornings

"The planet is all wobbly this morning."

Thanks for making the breakfast meeting, Harris.

"Dang it."

Alarm clock.

Time stood still – which made it an easy target.

"I told the carol singers where to go in no uncertain terms, so that's saved us some money!"

"Mummy's a bit grisly in the mornings. But after something to eat and a little nap, she's quite pleasant."

Eye Opener

"And a 'good morning' to you, too"

"He just woke up from hibernation."

'Sounds like someone got up on the wrong side of the bed this morning.' 'Ahhhhhh!'

'Honey, remind me why we switched to decaf.'

"OK, now here comes the lava."