Early Morning Grump Pillows

'Please don't say a word to me until my coffee gets right...about...here.

'I had my attorney draw this up. It states that if I choose to rise, I don't necessarily have to shine.'

"Well, I'm thinking about boarding school. Though I'm not sure they accept adults."

Broken Alarm Clock.

'Looks like no Christmas bonus this year.'

'Wait! That's not one of your novelty slippers...that's the cat!'

The Cat's Alarm Clock

'Did you use mouthwash this morning?'

"I know it's tough to get motivated on Mondays, but..."

'Next time you feel like keeping in touch, keep in touch with somebody else.'

'Misery is sleeping in late on Saturday morning then realizing it's only Wednesday...'

I am coffee and I need more coffee

"I much prefer the evening milking to the morning one: The farmer is not a "morning person", now is he?"

'This may be the only time I'll ever bring you breakfast in bed - So wake up!'

'Bonny, I've forgotten...What time is that 9 o'clock meeting tomorrow?...'

I'm going to hate myself in the morning, but I hate everything in the morning.

'If you get one who refuses to wake up, pour it in his lap.'

Moanathon.

"The planet is all wobbly this morning."

"Here! Drink your coffee... Honestly, you can be such a bear in the morning!"

Thanks for making the breakfast meeting, Harris.

The morning show for people who HATE mornings

"Dang it."

Alarm clock.

Eye Opener

Time stood still – which made it an easy target.

"Mummy's a bit grisly in the mornings. But after something to eat and a little nap, she's quite pleasant."

"And a 'good morning' to you, too"

"I told the carol singers where to go in no uncertain terms, so that's saved us some money!"

"He just woke up from hibernation."

'Honey, remind me why we switched to decaf.'

"OK, now here comes the lava."

"Flavor? It's 'let me drink my first cup before I stab you in the eyes' flavor."