E-procurement Pillows

e-procurement

'I think you are taking this elevator pitch way too literally'.

'We've financed three more startups for no fathomable reason.'

"I hope you're not going to let this I.P.O. affect your grades."

'Bread, milk, cereal, sugar, sausage, potatoes, beans, biscuits. Click! So easy, but I do miss the sexy till lady.'

"It's a shame, excellent recommendations and a superb skill set but lacks the boiling hot all consuming ambition and ruthless desire for self promotion required as head of stationary procurement."

Supply Chain

"This is what happens when you award the contract to the cheapest tender...."

"Procurement and their stakeholder journey down the procurement pathway... Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?"

'It's amazing what you can get on e-Bay these days.'

Gerald Ratner's return

"I need a pitchfork that's just a pitchfork."

John Lee Dotkomm palys the 'Broker's Blues

"Before we made the leap to cyberspace, our stockholders made us promise we'd maintain a traditional street presence, too!"

The contract was not worth the paper it was written on, which considering the paper was not a good sign.

'We're e-bankrupt.'

"UK government aren’t budging boss. Sole supplier or not under the new procurement regulations our new contract has to have three KPIs..."

'In conclusion; our major contract expires tomorrow, we have no idea what we want, and no knowledge of the market, It is time to pass this across to the Procurement Team...'

"Our website design could be described as "organic"... in the sense that people often compare it to poop."

"What burns my bottom about www.dazoosucks.com is that we capitalized them."

'I know it's the truth, but on this promo for our site, do you think we should use the promo code 'desperation?''

The AdRams Family no.1- Computers for kids

Internet Shoplifting

'A penny for my thoughts. Now accepting all major credit cards.'

"Hello? JS electrical? It's about this flat screen television I purchased from you."

'I realize this is your first sales call, young man, but 15 minutes is way too long to shake hands.'