E-procurement Gifts

e-procurement

No, I didn't know they were going to cut the office furniture budget in half.

'I think you are taking this elevator pitch way too literally'.

Olivia just hacked into the boy scouts' site and sold them 30,000 boxes of cookies.

'We've financed three more startups for no fathomable reason.'

Hamlet's struggle with online shopping addiction. To eBay or not to eBay.

Internet.

"It's a shame, excellent recommendations and a superb skill set but lacks the boiling hot all consuming ambition and ruthless desire for self promotion required as head of stationary procurement."

"I hope you're not going to let this I.P.O. affect your grades."

'Bread, milk, cereal, sugar, sausage, potatoes, beans, biscuits. Click! So easy, but I do miss the sexy till lady.'

"This is what happens when you award the contract to the cheapest tender...."

Supply Chain

Gerald Ratner's return

"Procurement and their stakeholder journey down the procurement pathway... Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?"

'It's amazing what you can get on e-Bay these days.'

'We're e-bankrupt.'

"UK government aren’t budging boss. Sole supplier or not under the new procurement regulations our new contract has to have three KPIs..."

The contract was not worth the paper it was written on, which considering the paper was not a good sign.

"Before we made the leap to cyberspace, our stockholders made us promise we'd maintain a traditional street presence, too!"

"I need a pitchfork that's just a pitchfork."

John Lee Dotkomm palys the 'Broker's Blues

"Dude, Amazon is so popular they named a river after it."

Starbucks doubles its sales by devising a way to sell coffee over the Internet,

'In conclusion; our major contract expires tomorrow, we have no idea what we want, and no knowledge of the market, It is time to pass this across to the Procurement Team...'

"Our website design could be described as "organic"... in the sense that people often compare it to poop."

"I guess we'll know ol' Mr. Willis is dead when the Amazon packages stop arriving."

"What burns my bottom about www.dazoosucks.com is that we capitalized them."

'I know it's the truth, but on this promo for our site, do you think we should use the promo code 'desperation?''

You Shouldn't Have

'I decided to close the stand and sell the lemonade on eBay.'

The AdRams Family no.1- Computers for kids

Internet Shoplifting

Death Of A Salesman. Playhouse. I hear they updated it to include internet shopping.

'I realize this is your first sales call, young man, but 15 minutes is way too long to shake hands.'

'A penny for my thoughts. Now accepting all major credit cards.'