Duet Enthusiasts Pillows

"You don't know me well enough to not care how I look."

'Say baby - 'come live with me and be my love, and we will all the pleasures prove, that valleys, groves, hills and fields,woods or steepy mountain yields' - Marlowe.'

Incompatible.

"We met through the personals. We both were seeking someone 'Rubenesque'."

'...In functionality and in dysfunctionality....'

"Homosapius amorius... the common lovebirds."

'I really can't stay for dessert. Why don't you stay and DVR the rest of the date for me?'

"Nobody told me it was a dress down wedding day!"

'Romeo and Julietta'

'...till death, or a really huge argument over ringtones, do you part.'

Dating - "Oh, and she must have a sense of humour."

"Do you have a boyfriend?"

Duel in a wheelchair.

His and Hers Wedding

"Yes, he was very nice, Mom, but he had to cut the date short because it was... 'report card time'!"

"You lack spontaniety."

"I'm experiencing bouts of heavy breathing and dizziness when I'm speed dating!"

"...and if you both can successfully complete this CAPTCHA, we'll continue with the vows."

Biological Cuckoo clock

'What do you mean, I'm not your type?'

"Ideally, I'm looking for a guy who can make me smile."

Ostrich Bar

"Can you tell me the story again about how you swiped right on Dad?"

'You remind me of my ex-ex-ex.'

Heart is sewn back together.

"We could have a shoot-out, then brunch."

Women's Idea of Sharing/Men's Idea of Sharing.

'Are you ready to get hurt again?'

When kissing a woman, try not to burp.

'Are you serious? I thought 'For Better or for Worse' was just a comic strip.'

A Tree Grows In . . . Wherever.

"I've become so good at dating—relationships that used to take months now last a matter of days."