Drug Store Enthusiasts Gifts

'Hmphh. Happy as clams, indeed. They're just all on Prozac.'

Antihistamine Rally At National Sinus Cavity

Customer Convention

"We're on our way to the mall to do some off-line shopping."

"What SPF sunscreen do you suggest for lying around in a sunny spot?"

"I understand they've uncovered some weird new side effects since you were here last."

"I forget. If I have an adverse reaction, do I call my doctor or my lawyer?"

Pharmacy School. We're having a pop quiz. I should have known there'd be surprise drug tests in pharmacy school.

"Hibernation - here I come..!"

Side Effects

'St John's wort ambulance' - hippy ambulance.

Placebonex: 'Make sure to take it every day, otherwise the effect wears off.'

'These smart pills are overpriced!"

'Have you got anything for late onset whimsy?'

'Bananas! Once you've skinned them and removed the bone, there's nothing left.'

'Success! We created a drug that is effective, quick-acting, and expensive.'

"I might suggest Ritalin."

The over-the-counter versions

'I don't understand why you don't want to take your daily medication.'

"She used to shop until she dropped, but with online shopping, we lost that protection."

"Attention, shoppers. We have a lost boomer at the information desk."

'It was more of a 'triple blind' test. The patients didn't know which ones were getting the real drug, the doctors didn't know, and, I'm afraid nobody knew.'

"This drug has such pleasant side effects I consider them value-added."

Pain relievers and pain inducers.

"I'm in a purchasing mood, but I don't know if I feel like goods or services."

Retailers Tech Expo. A customer just passed a card with an embedded chip by the sensor to complete the purchase! They wave goodbye to their money!

"Whore of Babylon?"

'I don't care if you got it at the dollar store...GET THAT BIB OFF OF MY SON!!!'

"By the authority vested in me by Bloomingdale's, how may I help you?"

"They're not the tastiest, so try hiding them in a piece of cheese before you take them."

'This one controls postoperative pain and this one controls the pain you feel when I tell you how much it costs.'

Pharmacy: 'It's a miracle drug because it hasn't been taken off the market yet.'

Business is slow, thank goodness.

R Prescriptions

"This new pharmacist gives me the willies." "Surprise! Make America Great Again!"